Ok, first niggling question. When I turn a corner in the S-Type, there's a distinct dragging-spring, clock-parts kind of a sound coming from the steering wheel itself, like the rotating contacts are crunching or misaligned. Is this a common issue, or one that's blessed just me with it's curious delights? nothing on the steering wheel is actually failing to work, it's just going... sprooooinnnngggg

 

perhaps this will help:
https://www.jaguarforums.com/forum/s...val-faq-61287/

 

If it sounds like R2D2, you might only needed to add an additive to the steering fluid...

 

It's your power steering fluid. Forget the additive they don't make it anymore. Go buy a quart of ATF Dexron III transmission fluid. Suck 1/2 a quart of fluid out of the power steering fluid reservoir. It's the white one with the steering wheel embossed on the top. Don't make the mistake of confusing the brake reservoir as someone did here and dump ATF in - disaster soon ensued.

Replace the sucked out 1/2 quart with the ATF. Go find an empty parking lot and crank the steering all the way over and take a couple of spins one way and reverse the steering and repeat spins in the other direction. Drive it for a week and repeat with the remaining 1/2 quart including the parking lot. Don't consume mild altering substances before the parking lot as you may get to make some new uniformed friends responding to a call of some nut driving in circles around a parking lot. Short story the cop wanted a ride and he got one "he won't forget" - his words.

This advice is worth exactly what ya paid for it...

 

Of the list of possibles, I am moderately sure it's the clock spring doo-daaah. I shall look around for a suitable replacement. I don't think it's the PAS fluid.