I finally pulled the trigger and bought a 2014 XJL, it has 31,000 miles only. Now all the local car guys are "praying for me" because everyone who doesn't know anything has "heard" that these cars are so unreliable and the engines are a "ticking time bomb", which is why the values are so low supposedly.

I have not heard anything bad from experienced technicians on these, other than some coolant leak issues that tend to crop up more than on most cars.

 

The local guys you are referring to are not up to date. Gone are the days of Lucas, Brtitish Leyland and Ford that were link and connected to Jaguar. Jaguar and Land Rover are now awholly-owned subsidiary of Tata Motors.
Their goal is quality and sustainability on luxury cars.
I used to a believer that Jaguars were unreliable vehicles, but after owning one, I am now a convert, a fan and admirer of these cars

 

As far i have heard the background the deal with Tata Motors was only realized after big change of manufacturing ideology. Less inhouse production for components what are easyly available from major OEM manufactures (ZF Group, ATE, Denso, Valeo, Ford/PSA etc..) for faster R&D and improved reliability. Exsample: Instead of (any) car manufacturer desing its own brake caliber and install it in the 10-100k vehicles in production, the reliable outcome of the desing will take years, comparing OEM manufacturer who build 1milj calibers for 6 different manufactures, the outcome from the desing come out just 10 months by huge amount of users.
Modern Jags are as reliable as any modern vehicle. (every margue have its own weak points - the race for low emissions have its prices)
On JLR petrol engines the water pump and plastic coolant piping are something you need to keep eye on (exept inline 4), Diesel have same as any diesel: Low usage will cause issues with exhaust recycle systems / oil dillution)

Brakes, suspension parts, etc wear and tear parts can be found from aftermarket channels by OEM brands, so no need to use JLR dealer if it´s not economically sensible for a old vehicle.
Even air suspension seems to be bullet proof.

 

Can you DIY the repairs? This is the real key to successful Jaguar ownership.
If not owning a used luxury car of any brand will be expensive!

Now you came to the right place because it's just a car with an engine/transmission and 4 wheels.
This forum has helped me with so much! But again this has been the best car I have ever owned and I am old!
2014 XJR coming up on 60K miles with almost zero problems.

I say almost because it looks like my AC needs a DPS valve. Again courtesy of this list I got the TSB which included the part numbers needed.

Also the US never got the Diesel so every car you look at in the US will be gas powered.

Now if you don't or can't DIY please look very hard for a local independent Jaguar mechanic. This is NOT an easy or simple thing to do!
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I don't DIY but after owning a 2005 Quattroporte for the past seven years I am very familar with eye-watering repair bills. I expect this Jaguar to cost me a lot less, if only because the parts are so much cheaper. Front brakes on the Maserati cost me $2,000 this summer. Replacing the alternator was a further $2700.

I've also had to drive 150 miles to take my Maserati to a good service facility, meanwhile there is a Jaguar specialist shop a couple of miles down the road here in town. This is a major reason for my choice of new car!

 

I think with your prior ownership of a Maserati and a good local repair shop you should be fine.
Glad to hear you are prepared!
Do change the oil sooner than Jag recommends too. I use a 6K-8K miles change interval.
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