So after 12 years and 16 Jags the law has finally caught up with me. For those who have the time here's a readers digest version of my first ticket in 25 years. (excuse my formatting and punctuation... it is what it is)


Purchased an 07 XKR with 19,000 miles in late Oct. last year. Drove it home from Grand Rapids MI to central Wisconsin on tired Pirelli's so I was not able to cut her loose (and I did not know how to turn off the traction control). Spooled up a month later 4 Blizzaks and was far more confident with experiencing the car. However doing a burn out with $740.00 worth of rear tires was out of the question. So I finally got around to changing back to the Pirelli's a couple days ago. Yeah I know a little late for Blizzaks but now I figured with only 6 months or so to snow maybe I could get by running the original Pirelli's and put off buying new set of tires until next year.
So now it's finally time for a burn out. After all it's been 8 months. Not ever doing one in this car and realizing how fast things can happen in this car I didn't want any eyeballs watching me until I had a few practice runs in. So I head off into the country side where I grew up. So it's Friday night around dusk but not dark, I'm at a four way stop with corn fields on all sides as far as the eye can see. New black top with a decent hill to the right so I'm going right to get the benefit of gravity. Now it's only ten seconds or so to get the traction control button to realize your serious but it seems like 3 minutes when your waiting to do a burn out.
I can see a mile in front of me... nothing, a mile to the left... nothing, a 1/2 mile to the rear... nothing, 150-200 yards to the right... nothing. So I cut it loose, A 150 feet or so into it I'm in 3rd gear with incredible wheel spin, so I shift to 4th and she's still melting rubber and I cant see a thing behind me. So I thought "this is ridiculous" so I let off the gas ending the burnout early. Note: always roll up both windows when shredding tires, I did not so as I crest the hill smoke is still rolling out of the rear end, tires and the cabin. I look back to see how much of the ozone layer I have destroyed and through the incredibly dense fog that had suddenly settled in I see a set of headlights about a mile away.
Hmmm... must have been in the dip by the swamp "no matter it couldn't possibly be a cop" as I head down the other side. He sure made that mile up in a hurry, before I got to the bottom of the hill I was looking for a place to pull over.
So just coming from a barbeque and having a few cocktails with friends I started doing the math and realized I should be fine... but... would rather not have to go through the motions just in case. He appears at the window and doesn't say a word. He is just staring at me. So I finally break the silence, smiled and asked "what can I possibly say?" "Not much" he replied, "but I thought I would give you a chance". More agonizing silence so I asked "can I phone a friend?" He never even twitched, just looked at me. Finally he say's "License and proof of insurance".
So as I'm fumbling around the glove box for the insurance he asks "been drinking?" "not me I replied" figuring he must have smelled the Coors. "I seem to be unable to locate my insurance papers". "Stay in the car" he indicates as he walks away with my license.
So now I'm in the "Son of a Bitch... you have got to be kidding me phase". What more could I have done... that intersection probably has the sheriff on it 3 maybe 4 times a day for a total of 3 maybe 4 minutes of traffic enforcement per 24 hour period. I have got to buy a lottery ticket after this I'm thinking. Then I realize he could not have possibly have smelled alcohol on me as there was still smoke in the cabin, the car just reeked of rubber.
He comes back with two pieces of paper in his hand so now I know I'm golden and I'm not getting out of the car. $214.00 for no proof of insurance, this I just show my insurance paper work and it will be dropped. $214.00 and 4 points for "Unreasonable Acceleration".


"Questions?" he asked? "not me" I replied. "Have a nice day" and he turned and walked away. On his dash cam is the best burnout he as ever witnessed on patrol... guaranteed. Period. It was freaking insane and I cut it short. I will not need a hill next time. I figured the burnout cost me about a buck a foot... I would have had better value if I would not have let off the gas.
Why is it that the owner of an XKR looks at an "Unreasonable Acceleration" ticket as a badge of honor?

 

 

Ha...ha....ha... good story with decent ending! Lucky you are that he had a sense of humor :-).

I too had a recent encounter with the law but, I think, I would be foolish to paste the details all over a public forum... needless to say the guilty car is in "lockdown" right now! :-)

 

Oh do tell... that's what forums are for? I don't think homeland security is on site... I think... What was that?

 

Where I come from, we call that "hooning"

 

Now that I think about it, you could have fought that ticket and (maybe) won, as your actual Acceleration probably wasn't very Unreasonable. Certainly it was nowhere near the acceleration possible with DSC On.
Here, burnouts and such are called "Exhibition of Speed" regardless if one actually speeds or not. I guess it's the display of "I got it, you don't" kind of thing.

 

Now that I think about it, you could have fought that ticket and (maybe) won, as your actual Acceleration probably wasn't very Unreasonable.


I think the dash cam video would sink my ship. But you are correct my acceleration was minimal.

 

Many years ago ...

160 MPH. No ticket ... he was just curious to see the car.

 

Civil Disobedience.
I love it!

White Bear.

 

I used to have business dealings with a number of UK police forces, including the Lancastershire Constabulary. Their 'patch' includes a section of the M6 motorway, which runs east from the central Midlands past Coventry, then turns north and goes all the way up to Glasgow in Scotland.

Knowing I was a Jag owner, one of the team told me a story from his time in the Traffic division. Around the time the XJ-220 was being developed, an 'apparition' materialised on the M6. At about 2-3 AM on dark but clear nights, something large & low, with no plates, would come hammering up the M6 from the south. Speed was estimated to be well over 200, though no-one ever got a radar gun on it, and it would simply blast straight through Lancastershire and vanish towards Cumbria & the Scottish border. An hour or so later, it would come hammering back south again, heading towards Birmingham (and, presumably, Coventry beyond that).

I asked the storyteller if they'd ever tried to stop it. He said, "Well, road conditions & visibility were good, traffic was light, and the driver clearly knew what he was doing - he'd back off when encountering other vehicles, and only really go for it when the road was empty. We had nothing that could match it speed-wise, so the only option would have been to close the M6 and nab him when he was forced to slow down and come off. That would have been a major pain for everyone concerned, and could well have been dangerous. So we decided to let him get on with it."

 

Since we are telling speedy stories last weekend I was going just under 150 (147) through a beautiful s-turn neat Wildcat Mountain in New Hampshire when I got an alarm " cats system fault" I slowed down but the fault remained. I am now in hard mode. Off to the dealer for that and the a/c condensate leak.