Borrowed from the Corvette owners, but I believe everything still applies:

1. Thou shalt not fail to wave to a fellow Jaguar owner.

2. Thou shalt not pass a fellow Jaguar owner in distress without offering aid.

3. Thou shalt not feed thy Jaguar budget grade fuel.

4. Thou shalt treat thy Jaguar with respect; great power, great responsibility.

5. Thou shalt keep thy Jaguar clean and waxed at all times, yet thou shalt not bring thy Jaguar to an automatic car wash.

6. Thou shalt park thy Jaguar in such a manner as to protect her delicate fenders.

7. Thou shalt blow out carbon with a high speed run as required.

8. Thou shalt not cruise on an unpaved road.

9. Neither friend, nor foe, nor even thy spouse may drive thy Jaguar without first showing proper reverence.

10. Each Jaguar is an individual work of art; judge not, lest ye might be judged.




Stu

 

I was a Corvette owner for more than 30 years and last year I got rid of 3 Corvette and bought two Jaguars and a Ford truck. The two Jaguars I purchase we're a 2010 xfr and a 2006 XK8 convertible. I am well aware of the Corvette Creed and the do's and don'ts that you have listed and I live them to the letter with those cars but after a while it drove me crazy. Constantly cleaning all three of them over a weekend just to go to car shows. Love the cars but not the upkeep. But I still keep the two Jaguars in pristine condition but not as fanatical as I was with the Corvettes.

 

How about: thou shall have patience with folks who ask : "Where's the (leaping) Jaguar on your hood?" / "Why don't you have one?"

Thou shall not auto answer "Oh thanks" when you hear a compliment like "looking good". While it happens a lot, be sure they mean you and your car. It can be really embarrassing when you realize they were complimenting your lady's new dress or something!

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Amendments:


1) Thou shalt not attempt to understand Jaguar Engineers thought processes
2) Thou shall accept all Jaguar nuances and hold them as sacred
3) Thou shall accept that all Mustang owners will try to coerce you into a race
4) Thou shall blame only thyself if thou forget to place Kitty in Sport Mode should you accept the transgressing Mustang owners challenge...and thine loss is realized.
5) Thou shall reply with a smile when someone asks you "What kind of car is that?"
6) Thou shalt not be surprised when someone stops to look when your hood is up
7) Thou shall accept that your first time passenger is strangely quiet upon hard acceleration and subsequent wet passenger seat.
8) Thou shalt NOT drive a convertible with the top up on any dry days, no matter the temperature.
9) When passing others, thou shalt not make eye contact without also including a smile and gentle wave of the hand.
10) When Kitty misbehaves, thou shall have patience, but not necessarily understanding.