I have had my fair share of British electrical issues, but today is a strange one.
My Jag has been reliable electrically speaking, the only issue being the engine ground strap.

Today I went outside, and no response to the remote. The key would not unlock the door, nor would the trunk key open it. Obviously, the battery is dead.

No worries, the forum will save me, I thought. All of the posts assume the car is unlocked, though. The idea of popping the trunk from behind the licence plate didn't work for me.

Next, under the car I go with small leads to hook up to the starter, using my battery charger as a power source. Didn't work. Then, WD40 got the drivers door open. Up to the false bulkhead with the charger, no joy.
It then occurred to me that maybe my charger was dead, and sure enough.

Hmmm, where to find 12 volts? A small sealed lead acid acid battery didn't work, not enough power. I know, I'll use my daughters car, and jump it!. Oh right, the jumper cables are in the Jag's trunk.

Some days the electrical gods just don't like me.

Using some small test leads I managed to get the trunk open. I have a battery tender, but it wouldn't give enough power to unlock doors, or do much else.

Must be a battery drain, I thought, and sure enough, a 2.8 ohm reading from the positive lead to ground. Out comes the JTIS, and after unhooking every power distribution bus on the car, the only one left solved the issue. The RH heelboard bus held the problem. Then I pulled every fuse, and again, the last possible fuse was the culprit.

It was for the drivers seat heat. I went in search of the relay,and found the problem. Last night, my daughter acted a designated driver for us. She is much shorter than me, and had the seat run far forward. Somehow the seat heat relay had gotten jammed under the seat and crushed, causing the seat heat to be on all night. Good Lord, what a process to find that.

After prying the relay out and opening it up, it was fine once the pressure was off the plastic housing.

2 hours to find it, and an hour to assemble the car again, what a colossal waste of a sunny day. But at least we're on the road again!

Lesson learned: keep the drivers door key mechanism lubed!

 

Good story. Thanks for sharing. You need to practice the license plate mounting slot trick while the trunk is open. It works! It is harder to learn with the trunk closed.

 

Which slot, and which direction? Am I hooking something, or pushing it with a screwdriver?

 

Props for finding and fixing this problem! That 's a tough thing to do, especially on the Jaguars. They have more computers, fuses, and wires than anything I've ever owned. I have not owned a F-15 yet.

 

I've worked on aircraft the last 25 years, and they have a similar method of having several power distribution busses, although there is more protection in terms of circuit breakers and contactors.

I for one appreciate the heelboard idea, it's infinitely better than putting them under the dashboard.

 

Agreed. It is simple to reach most of the electrical the way they have it laid out. It could have been MUCH worse.

 

There's just so much of it though ...

 

True, my 73 Mini had 3 fuses I think.

But it didn't have heated seats, heated windshield, heated rear window, power windows,, power mirrors, electronic engine control, electronic transmission control, ABS, traction control, cruise, power seats, power door locks, power sunroof, stereo, phone, garage door opener, power trunk, power antenna, air conditioning, foglights, headlight washers, intermittent wipers (at least not by design), electric cooling fans, airbags, CD player, bluetooth, power tilt steering wheel, and God knows what else I've forgotten.